Peaks and Valleys
I sometimes forget that life is full of peaks and valleys of happiness; that it is not without its struggles. Part of what makes the highs so high is knowing what sadness feels like and knowing you’re not there. I do my best thinking in the valleys, my best writing; my best learning. I uncover characteristics of myself that I didn’t previously know were there, that make standing on the peaks of life even more fulfilling.
But that doesn’t mean the low points don’t hurt. I become solemn and melancholy; I withdraw into myself and feed the vicious cycle that is loneliness. Deciding there is no one to rely on but yourself does not make you a champion, it only increases the burden of everything around you, and it gets tiring. So much of my time in these low points is spent alone, wondering how I can ever let someone in when I feel so disappointed, wondering how anyone could ever let me in when they realize that I am a disappointment myself. Being prone to these bouts of sadness does not make me any more knowledgeable about getting through them though. It just seems to take time and patience, two things I’ve never really understood. I suppose all you can do is acknowledge your place in the journey and know that there must be a peak somewhere on the horizon.