Jamie Sanders

I seem to be a target for homeless hecklers. Not sure what it is about me but something screams “charitable” or maybe that’s “gullible”. Regardless, it’s become kind of a joke amongst my friends how often I am approached. The usual hecklers are easy to deal with but I seem to be encountering a more creative homeless crowd as of late and I often find myself unsure how to respond. As with many social situations, I always come up with the best responses after the situation has passed. Here are a few notable examples and how I should have responded if I was at the top of my game:

Sometimes when I’m at the store trying on makeup I like to pretend I’m Rainbow fish or maybe even a mermaid. The shimmer of the eye shadow on my hand looks like shiny scales glistening in the fluorescent light underwater oasis of my mermaid kingdom. Growing up, The Little Mermaid was always one of my favorite stories not only because she was a red head too (seriously guys, my hair is auburn when I don’t have a vitamin D deficiency from lack of sun), but because she always wanted to be on an adventure! I think we have a lot in common: a little bit daring, a little bit foolish, but mostly just in love with the world around her. Today I fell in love with a strawberry lip gloss and a baby pink eye shadow. Expect to see both in photos of my next adventure.